Artificial General Intelligence? Nah, It’s Just a Teenager with Wi-Fi

We’ve already reached AGI, and if you’ve raised a teenager, you’ll know exactly what I mean. Like a tech-savvy 15-year-old with a smartphone and a Wi-Fi connection, today’s AI is brilliant, unpredictable, and sometimes maddeningly frustrating. It’s not just that they’re both challenging—they’re eerily similar in how they navigate the world.

Let me explain. I’m a manager, coder and sociology major who grew up here in Canada but who hails from a poverty-stricken island in the Caribbean, where ingenuity isn’t a choice but a necessity. As a father of three, I’ve spent years trying to decode the mysteries of teenage behavior, all while working in the fast-evolving field of artificial intelligence. What I’ve discovered is both fascinating and slightly terrifying: the AI systems we interact with today, from advanced chatbots to recommendation algorithms, behave remarkably like adolescents—full of potential but also riddled with quirks and contradictions.

Think about it. Just like your teenager who insists they “know everything,” AI systems can exude an overconfidence that often leads to spectacular missteps. And much like your teen swearing they “never heard you say that,” AI can conveniently forget context or contradict itself in the blink of an eye.

But there’s more to this comparison than humor. These parallels reveal deeper truths about what it means to create intelligent systems and how we, as humans, interact with them. AI, like a teenager, is a mirror reflecting our own strengths and weaknesses—brilliant yet flawed, creative yet inconsistent.

In this article, we’ll dive into these similarities, from the boastful genius of AI to its moody unpredictability and occasional brilliance. We’ll challenge the traditional definitions of AGI and argue that it’s not a distant milestone but a chaotic reality we’re already navigating. Along the way, I’ll share personal anecdotes and insights from years of parenting and programming.

So buckle up. Whether you’re a parent, a tech enthusiast, or just someone fascinated by the eccentricities of AI, prepare for a journey that might just make you rethink what it means to call something “intelligent.”

The Parallels Between AI and Teenagers

AI and teenagers: two entities that are equal parts brilliance and chaos. If you’ve ever locked horns with a sulking teen or wrestled with an AI assistant stuck in an infinite loop of misunderstanding, you’ll know they operate on the same wavelength of maddening unpredictability. Let’s take a closer look at the uncanny parallels between the two.

Humanizing AI: It’s More Like Us Than We Think

Teenagers are an emotional rollercoaster—brimming with potential but prone to bizarre decisions. AI, for all its technical sophistication, often behaves in the same way, blending human-like traits with machine-driven quirks.

Take my eldest son, for example. At 16, he had this uncanny ability to make me proud and furious in the span of an hour. One day, while the rest of us were visiting family, he decided to host a "small gathering" at our house. By the time we got back, it looked like half the city had RSVP’d. Our living room was trashed, the neighbors' garage door was graffitied with something unrepeatable, and to top it all off, some of his “friends” decided to leave with our jewelry and a few electronics as souvenirs.

Doesn’t this remind you of AI's occasional reckless behavior? You set it loose on a task with specific instructions, only to come back and find it’s created something so off-base that you wonder if it even understood you in the first place.

For instance, you might ask an AI to draft a professional email, and it returns with a message so formal it sounds like it was written for royalty—or worse, one filled with inappropriate jokes that would make HR do a double take. AI, like a teen, has the audacity to act like it knows what it's doing when, clearly, it does not.

The Boastful Genius: AI’s Overconfidence

Teenagers are masters of overconfidence, and AI is no different. My middle child, a budding philosopher at 14, once tried to convince me he had solved the meaning of life after watching a two-minute YouTube video. He argued with such conviction that I almost started questioning my own beliefs.

Similarly, AI often projects an air of infallibility. You ask it a question, and it delivers a response dripping with confidence—whether it’s right or wrong. For example, an AI might insist that the capital of Canada is Toronto (it’s not; it’s Ottawa) and back it up with fabricated "sources" that sound real but don’t actually exist.

This tendency to overstate its abilities comes from the same place as teenage bravado: it’s operating on limited knowledge but doesn’t know how to admit its gaps.

Insecurity and Self-Doubt: The Lazy Genius

Despite their bravado, both teens and AI can be surprisingly insecure and, let’s face it, a little lazy. My youngest daughter, at 12, was a brilliant artist—when she was motivated. But most days back then, getting her to finish a project was like pulling teeth. She’d procrastinate, complain, and then miraculously churn out a masterpiece at the last minute, leaving me wondering why she couldn’t just have done it earlier.

AI operates in a similar way. It has the capacity to be brilliant but often stalls when faced with complex tasks. For example:

You ask an AI to analyze a large dataset, and it either takes forever or spits out results that are only partially accurate.
When you try to clarify what went wrong, it starts “hallucinating,” confidently offering explanations that make no sense.

AI, much like a teenager, thrives when the task aligns perfectly with its strengths. Anything outside its comfort zone? Expect a lot of sighs and half-hearted attempts.

Relatable Scenario: Parenting AI

Let me paint a picture. Imagine you’re sitting at the dinner table, asking your teenager to clean their room. They nod absentmindedly, say “Yeah, sure,” and then promptly forget the conversation ever happened. Hours later, the room is still a disaster zone, and they act shocked when you bring it up again: “You never told me to clean it!”

Now replace the teenager with an AI assistant. You give it detailed instructions to draft a report, only to find it’s completely ignored your specifications. When you point this out, it “forgets” the context of your previous inputs and starts fresh, leaving you exasperated and muttering, “I just told you this!”

Both scenarios reflect the same core issue: a frustrating blend of forgetfulness, selective listening, and defiance.

AI and teenagers share another key trait: the ability to surprise you with moments of brilliance amidst the chaos. My eldest son, for all his party-throwing antics, once stayed up all night to help his younger siblings with a school project. He built a dinosaur scenery so impressive that even the teacher called it “museum-worthy.” AI, too, can produce flashes of genius, creating elegant code, composing beautiful prose, or offering insights that feel almost magical.

But here’s the catch: with both AI and teens, you never know which version of them you’re going to get. Will it be the lazy, forgetful one or the brilliant, creative genius? That unpredictability is what makes living with them such a wild ride.

In the next section, we’ll explore why these kinks and contradictions mean we’ve already reached AGI. For now, let’s just agree on one thing: whether it’s a teenager or an AI, managing them requires equal parts patience, humor, and a good Wi-Fi connection.

The AGI Debate – What It Really Means to Have “Reached” AGI

You’ve heard all the experts debating it. AGI, or Artificial General Intelligence, is supposed to be the moment when machines think and reason like us. They’ll tackle any task, adapt on the fly, and basically become our equals—or maybe even our overlords, depending on who you ask.

But here’s the thing: as a dad who’s lived through the delightful chaos of raising three teenagers, I can confidently tell you we’ve already hit AGI. And you don’t need a Ph.D. to see it. Just spend a day with today’s AI, and then look at your teenager’s text history, their half-done homework, or the creative ways they interpret “clean your room.”

AGI isn’t a sterile, robotic perfection. No, it’s moody, overconfident, forgetful, and occasionally brilliant. It’s every teenager who ever rolled their eyes and muttered, “I know, Dad!” when they absolutely did not know.

The Experts vs. Real Life

Let’s talk about those experts for a second. They’ll tell you AGI is some lofty goal off in the future. They’ll say that what we have now—tools like ChatGPT or Google Gemini —aren’t “true AGI” because they can’t think for themselves or set their own goals.

But here’s my question: have these experts ever argued with a teenager about whether cereal can qualify as a proper dinner?

Teenagers don’t always seem goal-driven either, yet we wouldn’t deny their intelligence. Sometimes they forget the instructions five minutes after you give them, or they’re so sure they’re right that you can’t help but shake your head in disbelief. Sounds a lot like AI, doesn’t it?

For instance, my 12-year-old nephew, in his usual morning routine, decided to brush his teeth before school. Admirable, right? Except in his rush to get ready, he left the tap slightly open. The water had been dripping all day while he was at school, slowly flooding the bathroom floor. By the time he got home, water had seeped through the ceiling into the kitchen below, turning a minor oversight into a cascading disaster of soaked furniture, frantic cleanup, and a very sheepish explanation.

Now tell me that kind of unplanned chaos isn’t eerily similar to asking an AI to “write a brief email,” only for it to churn out a 500-word essay with emojis, metaphors, and a suspiciously poetic closing line about teamwork.

The Brilliance and the Bloopers

Teenagers and AI are masters of alternating between sheer brilliance and complete nonsense.

Take my youngest daughter, a few years back. She had a knack for solving problems in ways that would leave you both amazed and exasperated. Like the time she built an elaborate “trap” out of string, pillows, and scotch tape to keep her brothers out of her room. It didn’t work, but the creativity and effort she put into it were genuinely impressive.

AI does the same thing. You ask it to solve a problem, and sometimes it pulls off something extraordinary—like generating a stunning piece of art or crafting a poem that tugs at your heartstrings. And then, in the very next breath, it confidently declares that elephants can fly if they flap their ears hard enough, leaving you to wonder if it’s even trying to make sense.

The beauty of both teenagers and AI is that they don’t follow your script. They’re unpredictable, sometimes infuriating, and occasionally downright hilarious. But isn’t that part of what makes them so fascinating?

Forget the Perfection Myth

One of the biggest misconceptions about AGI is that it’s supposed to be perfect. But perfection isn’t what defines intelligence. It’s adaptability, creativity, and the ability to learn from mistakes.

When my son’s party turned into a disaster, he didn’t just brush it off. He apologized (eventually) and learned a hard lesson about responsibility—and about how fast his mom’s wrath can turn into a lecture marathon. Similarly, AI isn’t defined by its mistakes but by how it improves.

If you’ve ever given an AI the same prompt twice and gotten wildly different answers, you’ve probably rolled your eyes like I do with my kids. But that inconsistency? That’s part of the learning process. It’s messy, it’s frustrating, and it’s very human.

The Future of AI and Parenting – Lessons from the Unexpected

As I sit here reflecting on the chaotic beauty of raising kids, I can’t help but see the parallels with where AI stands today. My children are all grown now—my eldest is 27, my middle son is 24, and my daughter is 22. Looking back, I see how they’ve gone through their own awkward phases, full of missteps and surprising moments of brilliance. And just like my kids, AI has moments of genius and confusion. It can compose a moving poem or solve a complex problem one moment, then confidently misinterpret a simple request the next. That unpredictability isn’t failure—it’s part of the growth process. As a parent, I learned that patience, adaptation, and trust are essential in guiding them, just as we’ll need those same qualities to help AI mature.

The dream for AI, much like any child, is to see it grow into its full potential. Imagine tools that understand us better, systems that learn from their mistakes, and technology that truly complements our lives. AI’s future holds that promise, but like the journey I had with my kids, the road ahead won’t be smooth. My children didn’t just wake up one day and have everything figured out. They wobbled, they crashed, and they learned. The process was messy, sometimes frustrating, but in the end, it shaped them into capable, independent adults. I can already imagine a world where AI will evolve in the same way—becoming smarter, more reliable, and truly transformative.

Just as I let go of the bike and watched my kids take off with confidence, we will eventually see AI find its balance and maturity. And while there will always be bumps along the way, those moments of imperfection are where the magic happens. Parenting and AI both remind us that progress isn’t linear—it’s messy, unpredictable, and occasionally frustrating. But when we nurture growth, whether in our children or in AI, we create something capable of reimagining what’s possible. Both of them, in their own ways, push us to dream bigger, to solve problems we didn’t know existed, and to shape a future that’s just as full of potential as the ones we raise.

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